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Help with writing reviews

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Posted By : The Old Bank Inn | Comments : 27

Why do I always struggle.........


How do you write an accurate review? There are many questions I ask myself and after reading many reviews, I just find them so repetative and question how much truth is written and how much purely advertising?? Having previously been an editor of an international journal, am I just being paranoid? Then again, I was qualified to critique within that topic! How could I possibly review a band when I can only play piano with one hand; can read music but have to write the notes down; can show my sons where to position their fingers when playing guitar, but can't do it myself!!!! Ok, so I thought I'd best just stay clear of saying anything, as that's the safest way......yes??? no??? How honest can you be without offending anyone??? As a venue, what should I consider; how well I thought they were,what customers thought, or how successful were they for the business?? As a tester I think I will try to review our last band.......Night Train.......(will follow shortly) any thoughts on how I can improve greatly appreciated xxx

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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 03/08/2010, 01:33 (GMT)

1st Attempt.....

As usual, I arrived after the band had set up. I'd only just got my jacket off and the 1st question of the night was WTF am I in the right place? A wee bit astonished I said 'What do u mean?' to the reply of 'you've obviously not noticed'!!! Putting a smile on my face (as you do with irate customers) I walked away saying 'oh I'm sure I will!' So looking around just incase I hadn't noticed anything, nothing was evident. So, customer no.2 pipes up 'is it a f*n ghost train tonight? To which I reply 'Its actually quite busy for this time of the night!'............so as everyone's getting into the spirit before the band starts I overhear a conversation that goes a little like this........................ 'it's f*n Jesus'....'...is it ****, it's *** Ozzy!!!! Okay me thinks, let them sort it out themselves.

Then the band begins.............okay, at that point I'm kinda realising what that conversation was all about. The bass guitarist does look a bit like Ozzy, or is it Jesus – to be honest it could be either one of em, but as another customer approaches the bar and say **** me man, it's Jesus on stage and he aint got any shoes on either – my vote went to Jesus! Then the announcement is made, 'Jesus' had just been for a dip in the sea...............**** me, all me customers were sh**in themselves. Now just as I was trying to calm everyone down and listen to the band, another customer walks in, straight upto the bar and says 'Oh I'm so pleased Shadrack is still alive, and why did he waste so much of his time in Emmerdale when he was obviously so talented?'..............at that point a large debate was had whether we were all living or dead............and that's why I hate writing reviews. Because there was so much more going on than just the music..........spooky or what lol xxx


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# Posted by Ian from Bolton - 03/08/2010, 11:00 (GMT)

Going off that, you have a nice way with words.

All you need to do to write a review is simply to put how an evening went for everyone in your own words.

Good stuff,
Ian x


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# Posted by NIGHT TRAIN - 03/08/2010, 11:00 (GMT)

hahahha! Nice one!....like the bit about Jesus going in the sea!


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# Posted by LAST GANG IN TOWN - 03/08/2010, 12:55 (GMT)

Why do you struggle...????
Who gives a shit about 'if your locals' cant decide on Jesus or Ozzy....who cares about Soap Opera characters.....
We care about the MUSIC....the BAND.....write about them.....


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 03/08/2010, 20:43 (GMT)

@Ian - lol that was mostly customers, you know me better than that lol. See I think the problem I have with writing anything is I have my own account, customer feedback and how it went for the business all going on in my head at the same time! And I have only JUST learned that the things we tend not to say, are often the most important points.......or are they lol xxx


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 03/08/2010, 21:05 (GMT)

@LGIT - the reasons I struggle is probably (I'm not sure) because of the reasons mention above. I'm sooo not musical but LOVE live music; however, I don't just have my own opinions to take into consideration but that of my customers aswell. So, when people ask for an honest opinion, is that my opinion or that of the customers who came to watch? The MUSIC...the BAND...does that include the 'PEOPLE' who came to play the music in the band...??? See, I'm getting confused again.... Oh no, I will have to start my 2nd attempt all over again :-(

Luv an hugs Jax


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# Posted by 45's - 03/08/2010, 21:37 (GMT)

Jackie and Wullie, see you on the 14th. I'll write the revue for you before we head back to Bolton, lol,

Rickxx


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 03/08/2010, 22:15 (GMT)

haha....psml....U have no idea how much I have learned over the last few days Rick....I will get to the the review/feedback (whatever it should be called lol) asap, just busy sorting out some other less important things involving HMCE lol.

We're both looking fwd to the 14th Rick (I won't have a drink until then lol). Unfortunately Wullie didn't get to see Night Train on Sat as he's sunning himself in Spain leaving me to run the pub,look after kids and do the VAT return lol. C ya soon xxxx


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# Posted by Willow (of somebig™Fish) (Reti... - 03/08/2010, 22:46 (GMT)

@Gary
Regarding .... "Who gives a shit about 'if your locals' cant decide on Jesus or Ozzy....who cares about Soap Opera characters..... We care about the MUSIC....the BAND.....write about them..... "

I think when a venue does a review then there's not a lot of value saying Band A were awesome, Band B were brilliant etc etc, without giving their views as to whether they (the venue) have profitted from the band's appearance - after all that's what they're booking and paying for.
And by profitting I mean in all senses, not just financially - they're basically choosing and serving up the entertainment to their punters and if they please the majority of their punters, then they're hopefully on to a winner .. So if said punters are entertained by things other than the pure music experience then it has value in including it in a review.
I think.
Leave the "music" reviews to the musos

Willow


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# Posted by 45's - 03/08/2010, 23:41 (GMT)

@ Willow, I know what you mean - I think?, lol,

Ricardo Gazellion aka Lick, Wick and been called a lot worse !


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 03/08/2010, 23:47 (GMT)

Night Train

Apolgies for the delay in posting this but I've had lots to think about lol :-)

I had waited a very long time for this one, and although I personally enjoyed listening to Night Train (and LOVE Alec's solo stuff), I must admit I was a bit worried whether the customers would enjoy it. Should I have been worried? Far from it............!!!!

Before the band even started, customers were already intrigued and I can hosnestly say I have NEVER experienced a band that was so capable of arousing such curiosity. Here was a band (customers hadn't heard them play yet) with 4 members who looked so incapable of even being associated with one another, let alone share any interests. How wrong can people be! From the opening song, customers were in awe of Night Train; and an overwhelming atmosphere filled the room, with what I can only describe as respect and bewilderment. The passion, professionalism and connectedness of this band has got to be witnessed, before any explanation can be understood (and even then, putting it into words is another complete dilema in itself).

In my opinon and customer feedback, people only knew about 50/60% of the songs, so what was it that was keeping them in? After all, people had complained and left previous gigs as they did not know enough songs! What was so special about Night Train.........absoloutly everything!!!! From the onset you are completely drawn in by these guys and left wanting more...and more....and even more. I mentioned to the band that customers had been a bit quieter that night, but the reality was they were totally fixated and in a 'trance like' state, being drawn into a world of...... perhaps fantasy???

As a venue and lover of live music, this was a success in every possible way. Yes, I want Night Train back asap! Yes, my customers have never stopped talking about this 'wacky' band! Yes, from a business point of view my till were going caaaachhinnnggg! Yes, my customers feel a connectedness to Night Train (now known as Shadrack, Jesus, the young guy and the sensible one)! Yes, we all loved them and finally YES we all want to spend a night with Jesus!!!!

Massive love and hugs from all at The Old Bank, apologies to Alec, Pete, John and Alex if the above post caused you any problems …...but it was ****'s fault!!! Thanks ****, you have no idea of the stress you have caused me lol...............then again, you have no idea how much you've taught me either!!!!!

XxXxXxX


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# Posted by 45's - 03/08/2010, 23:54 (GMT)

Jackie, can't find that video - soz - I'm thick btw,

Rick n Anne, xx


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 00:19 (GMT)

@Willow - totally agree! And although I can't review musically I can tell what worked for customers and what didn't. Where my problem is/was/has been (lol) is what 'bits' can you say and what can't you say? Would bands be offended if I said 'to be honest, customers loved your music but thought you had no character and were being forced up there'? Or ...is it offensive to the musos to say customers loved the characters as much as the musicians etc etc....

Over the last few months I have taken more and more on board of what the customers have been saying.....and its made a huge differnce...and its only by reading a certain post by **** that for the 1st time, I thought well maybe being honest is definitely the way forward as that, at the end of the day is what the customer wants.

Oh I'd better shut up now lol...xxx


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 00:21 (GMT)

Rick whats your email address and I'll try emailing it x


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# Posted by 45's - 04/08/2010, 01:32 (GMT)

pm'd it Jack o' Lean - lol,

Rick. - The 45's playing "Live" @ The Old Bank Inn - Sat 14th Aug - Free Entry.


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# Posted by Bandfan - 04/08/2010, 01:44 (GMT)

Love this blog :))))))) and i am watching with interest..as i am crap at reviews an all..i avoid them like the plague..as i can only say how i feel and what i saw and heard.and what was said around me.
We all like different things,so its hard to give a decent review with out sounding...to sickly sweet and bias or over critical.so dont..as a rule review:( so as a fellow huge live music fan for a lot of years that plays nowt cant sing n glazes over whan EQ Backline..reverb..Pa.or what ever bandy or technical things are talked about ??zzzzzzz
My opinion is for what its worth
You painted a brilliant descriptive picture of the band ,the night,the music,how you heard it,the atmosphere,how your cutomers,the paying public recieved the band,how the night went over all,and the funny comments,it felt like i was there..and that tells me what i want to know as a punter, on your review i would go and see the band..great effort very entertaining and truthfull...do some more :)then i for one will know just what to expect as an audience..lol.is that cos we is both wimin.that i got what you said
Kath ;)


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# Posted by The Cottonhouse Shakers - 04/08/2010, 03:34 (GMT)

Well Night Train sound like a right set of weirdos! Shadrack? Jesus?


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# Posted by LAST GANG IN TOWN - 04/08/2010, 07:07 (GMT)

Jax
Much better 2nd effort, but who is **** ?????
Maybe you should book **** and give your punters something else to wax lyrical about.....I'm sure you could get **** to come to play in Blackpool.....and if you can't get **** maybe you could try a bit of 'Classic' Punk and book LGIT instead...!!!!
Then you'd really have something to write about.....


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# Posted by Willow (of somebig™Fish) (Reti... - 04/08/2010, 09:39 (GMT)

hmmm ... yep I'm a bit confused ... who is ****???
Willow


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 14:02 (GMT)

@Kath Aww, cheers Kath lol! Yeah wonder if its a 'wumin' thing haha. I could have wrote a book on Night Trains gig, so how can I possibly fit the night into a paragraph!! And I can honestly say that I have never seen customers drawn in, in they way they were. After the encores I was desperate just to go up and give Alec a fag and ashtray and say 'It doesn't matter, just smoke - I will risk my licence' lol... How barmey is that ;-) xx


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 14:10 (GMT)

@ The Cottonhouse Shakers - Well Night Train sound like a right set of weirdos! Shadrack? Jesus?

Please correct me if I'm wrong, but does it matter whether it was Shadrach an Jesus or Alec and Pete? You see the customers didn't know individual names but now the can say when is Shadrach and Jesus coming back and we will all know exactly who they are reffering to. Better to be remembered as Shadrach an Jesus than not to be remembered at all......me thinks!!!


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 14:15 (GMT)

Now that has just given me an idea - I should put questionnairs out to customers for their most memorable moments and find out why...and I bet I could pick the top 5.....


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 14:23 (GMT)

@LGIT Thankyou!!! Wonder if you'd still be saying the same after the 5th and 6th lol....

Does it matter who **** is??? You see, it didn't matter whether it was Shadrach or Jesus up on the stage...what mattered was is was a bloody great night which left everyone with an everlasting memory.

Unfortunately, I don't think punk would go down to well at The Old Bank....but hey, you never know I have been proved wrong in the past. Now I'm not too sure about ****, will defo need to check that out lol :-)


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# Posted by The Old Bank Inn - 04/08/2010, 14:28 (GMT)

@ Willow - believe me, your not as confused as I have been over the past few days haha. I don't know ****, but I read a review by this person and I was for the 1st time in my life gobsmacked!!! As within this review was all the things you wanted to say, but didn't think you could. But to be 100% honest, that review was one of the best I have ever read!!! So accurate and summed everything up in a nutshell. Ohhh I'm so jealous of ****'s writing skills lol xxx


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# Posted by Charlie & Norma - 04/08/2010, 16:01 (GMT)

Jackie, there's nothing wrong with your writing skills :-)))


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# Posted by Willow (of somebig™Fish) (Reti... - 04/08/2010, 16:59 (GMT)

well the two bestest reviews I've read on here recently were yours and Gary's, both for Shadrack & Co!!
Beltin stuff, keep it up both of yers
Willow


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# Posted by Bandfan - 05/08/2010, 14:42 (GMT)

LOl...not barmy at all Jackie...i have needed a fag every time i have seen Shadrack & Co an all ;) !!!! look forwards to your next review :)

Kath ;) xx


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