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I'll tell you what I'm not having.......

Filed Under : Rants

Posted By : Keith (RED ZOO) | Comments : 148

This is my list of what I'm not having....can you add to it?


Taliban - cowardly fucking IED laying bastards
Flat shoes on the ladies
Pubs shutting
Austerity measures
Price of fucking petrol
Work

I wont spoil it for the rest of you

Comments

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# Posted by Mick (ex Bad Horsie) - 26/09/2011, 22:56 (GMT)

A baby.


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# Posted by steviestardust - 26/09/2011, 22:57 (GMT)

If you don't cheer up you're not having that extension lead back either!


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 22:57 (GMT)

Bono !!!


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 22:57 (GMT)

A good day?

AYD


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# Posted by Roberto, fretboard polisher - 26/09/2011, 22:58 (GMT)

blue slip on canvas shoes with chinos.


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# Posted by Just Jay - 26/09/2011, 22:59 (GMT)

A curry!


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 22:59 (GMT)

Crash Helmets !!! they spoil your hair, lol


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 22:59 (GMT)

PMSL - spot on Rick
@ Stevie- Im in quite a good mood mate, especially after watching the documentary of the RAF apache pilots getting some payback last night
@ Al- thought you were gonna say Oasis


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:00 (GMT)

@ Rob...what a crap image that conjurs up!


Heres another

Tights!


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:01 (GMT)

MAN BAGS !!!! FFS


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:01 (GMT)

MOOBS !!!


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# Posted by Mick (ex Bad Horsie) - 26/09/2011, 23:02 (GMT)

MUSTERS!


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:02 (GMT)

STD's !!!!


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# Posted by John - 26/09/2011, 23:03 (GMT)

Yer right boss - tights!!

Rigging only!

AYD


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:04 (GMT)

SITTERS HEY JAY ???


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:05 (GMT)

ME SACK WAXED !!!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:05 (GMT)

@ this isnt nt even Al...whatever...cant be arsed...

Yes but my man bag (and it is a caterpillar built to last grrr man bag) hold all the stuff the kingpin band members wouldnt even think of bringing
Ipod,
black marker for set lists
diary for future booking
business cards
glasses cos I can see a fucking thing
Wallet that I rarely use at gigs
phone
gaffer tape
Keys that I always lose

See they have their uses


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# Posted by Roberto, fretboard polisher - 26/09/2011, 23:06 (GMT)

the only way is essex

(celeb who havent done fuck all for 20 years and even then..) reality tv shows

women wearing enough fake tan and makeup so they look like a clown that got dressed in the dark


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:06 (GMT)

rumour has it your sack is always waxed


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:07 (GMT)

@ Rob

Shat aaaap


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:08 (GMT)

Posted by Keith - Kingpin - 26/09/2011, 23:05 (GMT)

@ this isnt nt even Al...whatever...cant be arsed...


Nice to see you've got into the spirit of it!

BOXING GLOVES

ayp


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:08 (GMT)

I'm told they have their uses.....


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:09 (GMT)

@kEITH, pmsl, that was just a stab in the dark matey ;-)


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 26/09/2011, 23:11 (GMT)

In no particular order:
Much Sex
A wank to compensate
Any luck with the lottery
Any luck finding a job
Any fucking money
Fucking politicians
Fucking Rochdale
Any joy trying to get a reach around of my bitch - sorry that's the first one again!


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:11 (GMT)

@Wick, roflmao ya menk !!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:13 (GMT)

Heres some more

Cocks in BMWs (present company excepted)
price of 6 months road tax on my Mondeo estate
Mithering twats on the phone trying to -"conduct a market research survey"
Middle lane hoggers
Xfactor
Hotel prices in Edinburgh for a pint of tennants- £4.00


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:15 (GMT)

@ 4 most
next time you do get to do the deed

Fake it- that'll teach her!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:16 (GMT)

Edit - middle lane hoggers but its ok if I do it....


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:16 (GMT)

al have you got a boxing glove for wick?


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:17 (GMT)

Bleedin amp catalogues !!!!


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:19 (GMT)

Fookin' speed cameras!
Middle lane only tw*ts!
HollyfeckinOaks!
X*********(*********(*((*(YH*PYT)PO(TG^*(Y()^YTP%TPG*GT(&*)P*G&(P*&(P:*&G(GPFactor

That's better - that's off me chest!

AYD


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:20 (GMT)

Amps...dont get me started....I could have bought a fecking aston martin with what ive spent


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:20 (GMT)

Wick doesn't need 'em ;-)

Al


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 26/09/2011, 23:23 (GMT)

@Keith - Nah, she asked me once to compile a list of the top 5 people we're allowed to "sleep" with. Hers was the usual Colin Farrell, Ryan Reynolds, Brad Pitt etc. But when I said "your sister", world war fucking 3 broke out!


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# Posted by Mick (ex Bad Horsie) - 26/09/2011, 23:23 (GMT)

a small country that thinks it's bigger than it is stuck between American and European politics and getting the point of NEITHER of them. A country that is a corpse that thinks it has a pulse populated with polar opposites that want to apologise or get angry about forced homogenisation with both sides wearing a crocodile smile about the other.

*ticktickticktick*


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:26 (GMT)

@ 4most...fooking crying laughing

Sofia Vergara for me


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:27 (GMT)

MICK FOR PM

I'll vote for you mate


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# Posted by TEX & THE HARDCORE TROUBAD... - 26/09/2011, 23:29 (GMT)

pesky Injuns !!!


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# Posted by John - 26/09/2011, 23:30 (GMT)

@ Bad Horsie (Mick)

Trust you to bring it down to gutter level!!

Chips without salt n vinegar

AYP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:31 (GMT)

Some more Ive thought of

MPs Expenses

Shutting the M60 EVERY fooking weekend when Im driving back from a gig at stupid o'clock and i get diverted through Blackley and it puts another 20 mins on my journey-fook me they only built it 15 years ago

People that stand in the doorway when you are tring to get your gear out


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# Posted by John - 26/09/2011, 23:40 (GMT)

Guitarists that spend 5 mins changing guitars between songs....errr

I'll get me sticks

AYeD


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:41 (GMT)

Yes but it gives time for Al to have a puff on his oxygen......


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:42 (GMT)

gorgeous long legged dancing busty scantily clad female backing vocalists, that what I'm not havin !!!!
damn !!!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:43 (GMT)

Heres another.....cowboy boots

Runs for cover......


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 26/09/2011, 23:44 (GMT)

@Keith - People that stand in the doorway when you are tring to get your gear out

A well aimed guitar case into the offenders kneecap usually moves them on.


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:44 (GMT)

Supper!

AYP


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# Posted by The Boxing Marsupial - 26/09/2011, 23:45 (GMT)

or spurs :o)


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:45 (GMT)

Hmm, cuban heels can make some people seem taller though ;-)


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:45 (GMT)

Fookin' rappers

AYP


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:46 (GMT)

I'm big in other ways.... sideways! (beat ya to it)

AYfuckyoulotIhaveotherimagenaryfriendsP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:47 (GMT)

Oi...vertically challenged I may be but my feet dont hang out of the bed.....twot


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:47 (GMT)

Compare the fookin MeerKats


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:48 (GMT)

Cot Keith get it right !!! lol


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:48 (GMT)

It all started off so well too !!! ;-)


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# Posted by The Boxing Marsupial - 26/09/2011, 23:49 (GMT)

Oi Muttley!!


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:49 (GMT)

Muttley's chokin'!

AYP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:49 (GMT)

some more have been prompted

Go Compare advert
Road Works
Temporary Traffic lights
Stupid insurance renewal quotes
and how could I have forgotten - JEDWARD


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 26/09/2011, 23:50 (GMT)

'# Posted by Al? Al? Who the feck is Al? - 26/09/2011, 23:45 (GMT)

Oi!! I'll not have anything derogatory said about my beloved Tottenham!! Harry's doing a marvellous job at the minute!!


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# Posted by Graham - Mustard - 26/09/2011, 23:51 (GMT)

erm I mean... Oi Muttley!!


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 26/09/2011, 23:51 (GMT)

Muttleys been sick on the carpet and Guinness has come down his nose !!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:52 (GMT)

Prompts another

Tottenham fans

LMAO


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# Posted by Graham - Mustard - 26/09/2011, 23:52 (GMT)

I think he meant cowboy spurs pmsl


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# Posted by Graham - Mustard - 26/09/2011, 23:53 (GMT)

Didn't Tex's fall off at the Hindley Arms Charity do pmsl


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:54 (GMT)

Fookin' Meerkats!

Tex


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# Posted by TEX & THE HARDCORE TROUBAD... - 26/09/2011, 23:55 (GMT)

I may be nearin 40 but nowts fell off just yet, ya twot !!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:56 (GMT)

feck me where have you been all night?


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:57 (GMT)

Who, me?

AYW?


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:57 (GMT)

No - Tex


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:58 (GMT)

No - I'm Al

AYT


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# Posted by TEX & THE HARDCORE TROUBAD... - 26/09/2011, 23:58 (GMT)

I've been working undercover on a mission Keith, its purely on a need to know basis buddy ;-)
have I missed owt ??


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 26/09/2011, 23:59 (GMT)

Scratches head - turns off monitor - goes to bed


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 26/09/2011, 23:59 (GMT)

You don't need to know

AYP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 00:00 (GMT)

You can add your "aint having it" list bud


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 27/09/2011, 00:00 (GMT)

Tell you what I'm not havin !!!! any fookin sleep !!!


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 27/09/2011, 00:01 (GMT)

Oi Keith - Tottenham need all the fans they can get at the minute!!!

Apparently, during the Tottenham riots, someone threw a six foot plank through a shop window. Although Tottenham denied any serious injury, they did say it affected Crouch enough to see him moved on to Stoke!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 00:03 (GMT)

He must have something- to keep abbey Clancy happy

And it wasnt going to Stoke PMSL


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# Posted by TEX & THE HARDCORE TROUBAD... - 27/09/2011, 00:04 (GMT)

Dunno really, aint havin any Bigbrostrictlycumfactorgetmeottaherewank !!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 00:04 (GMT)


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 00:04 (GMT)

Nicely summed up Tex!


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# Posted by TEX & THE HARDCORE TROUBAD... - 27/09/2011, 00:07 (GMT)

Night John Boy ;-)


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 00:07 (GMT)

Night All!

Thanks


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# Posted by WAGONTOWN - 27/09/2011, 00:11 (GMT)

Skriking X Factor punters.
Metallic silver cars,why would anyone want a car the same color as a wet road?
Lads with their pants crutchpiece around their knees.
Running out of Branston pickle,when youve had a jar in the fridge for 2 years.
Eastenders,I need an interpreter.
The cat vomiting a dead mouse on yer carpet when its been out all night.,just when yer havin yer cornflakes.. Do yer want anymore....T



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# Posted by Mark C Marauder + Whitefake - 27/09/2011, 00:43 (GMT)

Fuckin coleslaw
having to trim my friggin eyebrows
pulling out ridiculously fast growing ear and nasal hair
the size of Mars bars these days
llamas
clothe fact that the most disappointing search in google images is the word 'flange'


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# Posted by Mr Cottonhouse - 27/09/2011, 01:06 (GMT)

Steve Kean
Motorway drivers who aren't aware that you are supposed to keep to the left.
politicians
Trisha
Venkys
camp tv presenters - any of them!
Steve Kean


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# Posted by JoeBass - 27/09/2011, 01:20 (GMT)

@ Anthem, there you go fellah have a look at this, it came up when I typed flange in google, it was about third down the list.,
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=flange
I know it's not images but it's funny.


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# Posted by Mr Cottonhouse - 27/09/2011, 01:52 (GMT)

@JoeBass - Oh dear.....LOL!!!

the thick end of an irn-bru bottle????? LOL


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# Posted by Shep - 27/09/2011, 04:14 (GMT)

Any twat that calls tea-time "a light supper"


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# Posted by Shep - 27/09/2011, 04:16 (GMT)

Every twat that appears on the Jeremy Kyle show ... including the host


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# Posted by Shep - 27/09/2011, 04:17 (GMT)

Tossers that sit in a traffic jam in front of you with their foot on the brake ... burning your fuckin' retina's out!


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# Posted by Shep - 27/09/2011, 04:19 (GMT)

And finally ... pricks that turn right on roundabouts without indicating ... cos you don't need to do you, after all the mere sight of a roundabout makes us all fuckin' mind readers!!!!


Long day!


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# Posted by UkePunk - 27/09/2011, 06:15 (GMT)

Liam Gallagher
Pop Tarts
GMPT
Ugg Boots
Sharkfin plectrums
Guitar Hero
Pay to play
'Call me Dave'
4 different fcking rubbish bins outside my gaff


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# Posted by ejectthetape - 27/09/2011, 08:19 (GMT)

tripe
trying to open a tesco bag
traffic wardens
fast food that isnt fast
tracksuit bottoms worn with shoes
phone calls about debt
david essex
cartoon character socks
jeans with elasticated ankles
car salesmen
friends (tv)
ikea

gonna have to sit down now, blood pressure is up


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# Posted by Dean (Drummer) - 27/09/2011, 08:45 (GMT)

50 year old Groupies


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# Posted by Andy McCormack - 27/09/2011, 08:46 (GMT)

Absolute dickheads on motorbikes and in shit cars with an unbelievably loud exhaust. Why?
Traffic Wardens. It isn't just a job.
Eastenders. The visual equivalent of the Daily Mail keeping the country wound up, and I pay my licence for the fecker.

Ooh I feel a bit better now.


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# Posted by Dean (Drummer) - 27/09/2011, 08:55 (GMT)

Old people that do their shopping during my lunch break
The kid that screams constantly on a flight


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# Posted by ejectthetape - 27/09/2011, 09:00 (GMT)

text jokes
spam emails (no its big enough thank you!!)
gold name chains
betterware catalogues


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# Posted by ejectthetape - 27/09/2011, 09:06 (GMT)

oh and at the moment DRUMMERS


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# Posted by Charlie & Norma - 27/09/2011, 09:43 (GMT)

"we're all in it together"....yea right Mr Cameron, who are you trying to fucking kid!!!!!

anymore sex...it's way overrated....or so Norma says:-(((


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 27/09/2011, 10:01 (GMT)

Michael F Sweeney on 'Real XS'

AYP

(see if you can work out what the 'F' stands for.....)


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# Posted by ejectthetape - 27/09/2011, 10:02 (GMT)

funny?


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 27/09/2011, 10:03 (GMT)

Errr....NOT!!!!

AYP


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# Posted by ejectthetape - 27/09/2011, 10:06 (GMT)

ooops sorry I meant fanny


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# Posted by Andy McCormack - 27/09/2011, 10:42 (GMT)

Oh and Jon Bon Jovi, Narcissus himself. Or is that Simon Cowell? In fact sod it both of em.


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# Posted by James - Metalleeka + AC/DCe - 27/09/2011, 11:50 (GMT)

anyone who's not having us nice friendly spurs fans :p


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# Posted by Mr Cottonhouse - 27/09/2011, 11:54 (GMT)

Tottington Hotspurs? Yeah they're ok.


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# Posted by Mr C. - 27/09/2011, 13:26 (GMT)

Ejectthetape beat me to it !!!

;O)


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# Posted by Steve Slinger - 27/09/2011, 16:25 (GMT)

Bands who big themselves up but who are actually shite.


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# Posted by John - 27/09/2011, 16:30 (GMT)

Peanut butter.
Any 'soap' operas.
The Sun 'news'paper.
Nissan Jukes.
The state of our feckin' roads!
Paulo Neutrini.
Big plates with a VERY small amount of food on.
Running out of bog paper.....

AYP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 16:31 (GMT)

Nissan Jukes...LMFAO


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# Posted by John - 27/09/2011, 16:33 (GMT)

Have you seen 'em? They've got to be the ugliest car ever.

How do they get people to buy them?

"Yes I know you'll look a complete tw*t, but we guarantee you a place in Heaven"

8-)

AYD


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 16:36 (GMT)

Bit like Fiat Multipla's


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# Posted by John - 27/09/2011, 16:37 (GMT)

Deja vu?

AYP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 27/09/2011, 16:38 (GMT)

not heard of them lol


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# Posted by BAFT DASTARDLY - 27/09/2011, 16:51 (GMT)

I like the Nissan Juke ;-) it's much better than my Micra !!!


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# Posted by T CLOTH - 27/09/2011, 17:09 (GMT)

Nothing wrong with 50 year old groupies

Bring `em on............


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 27/09/2011, 17:16 (GMT)

'# Posted by T CLOTH - 27/09/2011, 17:09 (GMT)

"Nothing wrong with 50 year old groupies"

There is Nick!! Ian T has had 'em all and you wouldn't wanna put it where he's been would ya??!!


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# Posted by T CLOTH - 27/09/2011, 17:23 (GMT)

Well there is that I suppose......... ...Any way 50`s quite young for most of my cabaret audiences.


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 27/09/2011, 18:00 (GMT)

As long as they don't turn up to the gig in a Nissan Juke....

AYP


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# Posted by The Ragged Company - 27/09/2011, 18:11 (GMT)

.......it.

Covers most bases I find.


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# Posted by [mark] Into The Void - 27/09/2011, 21:06 (GMT)

....am not having ...

jordan / peter andre / kerry fuggin katona / jade goody (before she became princess of our hearts #2) and the hundreds of other manufactured do nothing, worthless no marks who apparently are celebrities these days. The fact that there are B,C etc etc list celebrities at all shows what a fucking nightmare humans have actually become! They all have 2 things in common ... they rut like fucking pigs and they are as gormless as a piece of month old dried up dog shit......

[actually foamed at the mouth whilst typing all that!]


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# Posted by THE STAN'S - 28/09/2011, 11:26 (GMT)

@ LA80 (Mark) LMBAO !

Take it your a " Big Brother" fan then !!! lol!


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# Posted by [mark] Into The Void - 28/09/2011, 12:10 (GMT)

@ stans .... i pick more worthwhile objects out from under my toenails after a day wearing my riggerboots.


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# Posted by John - 28/09/2011, 20:39 (GMT)

DRUM MACHINES!!!!!!!!!!!!!


AYP


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 28/09/2011, 20:44 (GMT)

@ Mark LA80 so you feel strongly about this then? LMAO
@ Al, you are a human Drum Machine mate!


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# Posted by John - 28/09/2011, 20:46 (GMT)

I've got ham, but I'm not a hamster!

YD


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 28/09/2011, 20:48 (GMT)

So, transposing (As I often do) I've got Drums but I'm not a Drumster

Coat got!


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 28/09/2011, 20:56 (GMT)

I've got chills............................ they're multiplying........................

And I'm losing control...........................................................


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# Posted by [mark] Into The Void - 28/09/2011, 21:05 (GMT)

@ keith ... this following is true .... oh so true!!

I absolutely detested miss goody with a passion that i never knew i possessed before..... real pure unadulterated hatred!!! Hated her so much for being a talentless brain dead moron and yet still managing to get so many column inches in the papers "jade said this, jade wore this" and the one that made my piss boil the most "jade is a role model for the modern young women" .....WHAT!!!!!!????

I actually felt peeved when she passed away.....At the time my missus thought it was hilarious that i was almost mourning the fact that she had passed away ..... my nemesis was no more....my response to the missus "yes i am bitter and disappointed that the opportunity to ram a railway spike into her fat head has now vanished".

Does that imply stong feelings??? I dunno Im not a therapist..... and my last one is sadly no longer with us ... after the, ahem, 'INCIDENT'.


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# Posted by ROUTE 66 - 30/09/2011, 19:34 (GMT)

Flip flops or open toed sandals on anyone in a band


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# Posted by Roberto, fretboard polisher - 01/10/2011, 10:35 (GMT)

now worse then mens blue canvas shoes, is deck shoes, with no socks, with chinos CRINGE


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# Posted by Roberto, fretboard polisher - 01/10/2011, 10:36 (GMT)

max clifford and piers morgans, T**TS


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# Posted by Jez - 01/10/2011, 11:16 (GMT)

the various tonal qualities of capacitors!


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 01/10/2011, 13:26 (GMT)

The Black Eyed Peas - although I've got a feeling that tonight at Georgia Brown's is going to be a good night!

AYP


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# Posted by G-IT-22 - 01/10/2011, 14:01 (GMT)

Posted by 4most Wanted - 27/09/2011, 17:16 (GMT)

'# Posted by T CLOTH - 27/09/2011, 17:09 (GMT)

"Nothing wrong with 50 year old groupies"

There is Nick!! Ian T has had 'em all and you wouldn't wanna put it where he's been would ya??!!

......................they then bring their 25 yr old daughters ...and ..... ......... !!!!!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 01/10/2011, 18:41 (GMT)

Good one Al!


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# Posted by 4most Wanted - 01/10/2011, 21:55 (GMT)

'# Posted by G-IT-22 - 01/10/2011, 14:01 (GMT)

"Nothing wrong with 50 year old groupies"

There is Nick!! Ian T has had 'em all and you wouldn't wanna put it where he's been would ya??!!

......................they then bring their 25 yr old daughters ...and ..... ......... !!!!!!


Then their daughters say "look at that silly old twat in the pink vest, still trying to be a rock god!!"

Followed by " Mum, how can you go out with someone who spends longer on his hair than you"!!!


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# Posted by G-IT-22 - 02/10/2011, 02:57 (GMT)


........some band give '4 fk sake' a bass job please ....great singer/bassist .......b4 his blood pressure boils !!!!!


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# Posted by John - 02/10/2011, 20:52 (GMT)

Pissed up punters who completely ignore you all night until the last two songs then go absolutely fookin' bonkers singing and dancing like it's going out of fashion, then keep you on for three encores even though you're really hot and sweaty and want to pack up and feck off home for a nice cold beer, proceed to talk your ear off for half an hour about the bands they were in and the guitars they owned (complete with pictures on their phones) whilst you are trying to pack up and then, given the entirety of the interior and exterior of the venue, stand right in the doorway as you are trying to get your gear out, completely ignoring your polite "excuse me, excuse me", until they move about half an inch, only to move back as soon as you are past and then get uppity when you clip them on the leg with your kitbag (accidentally on purpose) which probably hurts quite a lot to be honest.

Punters - who needs them?

AYP


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# Posted by The Brierfield, Bolton - 06/10/2011, 06:24 (GMT)

@ayp i know how you feel (in a way)

i hate sundays, coz between 7 and 10:55 the pub is empty, i'm just about to close and in walls this guy. he buys one drink and won't leave til it's done. that normally take 45mins. at least. I WANT MY BED! it'd be ok if he'd partaken in some purchases throughout the evening but no! he'd rather come in late and piss me right off.

i know it's not quite the same but i kinda get your point. knobheads


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 20/01/2012, 17:40 (GMT)

Italian ship captains


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 22/01/2012, 13:36 (GMT)

Ha ha ha ha ha - just noticed that comment Keith!

People who only want to bring other people down.....

AYD


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# Posted by Fanny Oakley - 22/01/2012, 14:17 (GMT)

AYP - completely blown ur cover there matey! ;-)


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# Posted by Alyerpal - 22/01/2012, 15:46 (GMT)

And here's me thinking the 'AYP' at the end might be a bit of a give away.......

AYP


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# Posted by Fanny Oakley - 22/01/2012, 16:07 (GMT)

oh yes AMP lol cos i knew straight away that 'pornstar' would be you - after all, who else would it have been pmsl!!!


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 30/03/2012, 19:37 (GMT)

Panic bleeding buying at petrol stations

Price of petrol anyway


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# Posted by Jeepster Gaz ( RailerMania ) - 25/01/2013, 23:34 (GMT)

Tax Bill

Gas Bill

Phone Bill

Electric Bill

Council fuckin Tax

Car Tax


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# Posted by Keith (RED ZOO) - 28/02/2013, 13:10 (GMT)

Hindley Arms pulling bands- didn't see that one coming!


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# Posted by Hellwyck - 15/04/2014, 13:26 (GMT)

Hipsters / Scene kids
- Jedward hair and lensless spectacles make you look like a c**t


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