NWB - Community Blog

I'll give you £40 quid if you come and play in my shed. In fact, fuck that, I'll give you a ton if you build me one whilst you're here!!

Enjoy it while it lasts - sheds will closing every week soon. Probably due to supermarket beer or playing Sex on Fire!

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@Jez. It may be the way forward that mate. Build a shed, get some beer in, invite a few friends round, and play SOF as often as they want. Could put the boozers out of business this.

We've already had Rick booking acts for his conservatory. Wonder how he is for building sheds?

build the sheds and they will come!!! lol

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Is there a ladies loo in your shed?

If not, build one and make the bassist set up next to the door! ;)

remember to only install one power point, and put it somewhere hard to get to.

Don't forget to charge yourself £4 for a can of Stella out of your own fridge (after you've queued there for 10 minutes).

oh and a a curtain to cover your one window to stop the noise escaping and annoying people who live too close!

Great idea Dan. Don`t forget the fireplace for your drums/solo artists to set up in.

Employ one of your children as a crude volume limiter with the instruction that they simply switch off the single power point at random intervals throughout the night and not to switch it back on until someone runs at the socket switch brandishing a pool cue.

don't forget to keep your snooker table set up in your shed when not gigging so you have to move it before you set your gear up

...and don't offer the band a drink till the very death, when you know they've already bought one and they're driving!

don't forget to invite someone that will ask you all night for songs you dont play

....and make sure you're not there at the end of the night when you want paying your £40.

..... and make sure the smokers at the door keep asking you for Sex on Fire.


..........and make sure you put a grotty old piece of carpet on the floor so your feet stick like fuck.

And don`t forget to leave a cold chip on the carpet in front of said fireplace.

You've got to have a couple of guys to shout "Angus" after every song and at irrational times throughout the night.

Also some ageing guy who will tell you how good you've been and then criticise everthing because they didn't do it like that when he played his Gibmans Telyyfender

Don't forget to offer yourself a drink on the house after you've played and already had your limit 'cos you're driving.

And get someone to be Tex to shout 'we love you Dan' after every song.

;-)

AYP

Did you remember to not bother putting up the posters you sent yourself 3 weeks ago?

Hope you remembered to send yourself a poster. You know who`ll be to blame if no one turns up

Ha ha Tubthumper-you beat me to it!

By the time he's arranged for all the folk he needs to shout Angus, block his entrance, queue in front of him at his own fridge, make tedious comments about corpses in his hardware case etc etc I don't think he need worry about attendance. Maybe this is the solution to the gigging problem! We ought to be holding casting calls for people to fill these positions at every gig and calling them "extras" (not to be confused with THE Extras) and if they have non speaking parts they don't get paid but they do have a chance of getting a heckling role at future events. Problem solved. Everyone will feel like a star for the night!

Tubthumper for Prime Minister!!

AYP

You're just saying that to stop my 111 comment rambling life story diatribe on your facebook aren't you Al? Won't work. Plenty of fuel in the tank. I don't talk to people in person but when it comes to typing I'm gregarious!

Don't forget to put an annoying pop music CD on your CD player and then leave it running in the background for your first three songs.

And make sure there's a bunch of drunk people sat where you intend to set up.

let me guess - you finally turned up at the venue, it's got new owners and you've found out you're double booked!!! lol

.... i don't know, some of the above are just plain ridiculous aren't they! Could never happen!

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oh hang on! Me and my 50 mates were told you were on tonight not last night. Nevermind we'll have to do our annual ''Drink £100 worth of beer each in the same pub night'' at another venue and tell the 50 girls that their ''Get semi naked and kiss each other for the blokes to ogle night'' will have to be cancelled too. Bloody landlord can't read a diary methinks

don't forget to interrupt yourself mid-complex-solo by tugging on your sleeve to ask for a tune you don't play then look pissed off at yourself when you don't reply coz your busy playing and singing!

Love the Cardiacs vid, as I always say, “you can’t beat a good bit of alternative rock/psychedelic pop/prog/punk”. Nice.
I have a shed too. If you want to play in my shed send me a demo, which I won't have time to listen to, then call me back in a week or so when you'll have 'just missed me'.
MN